“Comparison is bad news - stay away from it as far as possible.”
-Euginia Herlihy
Back in the day when I was a young aspiring salesperson, the firm I worked for had a contest to reward the top 750 individuals who opened the most accounts in the first four months of the year. My competitors in the contest totaled about 10,000, but I was determined that I could secure a spot in this elite group. The prize was four nights at the Ritz Carlton high-rise, beach-front hotel in Cancun, Mexico. Up until that point, the highest building I had ever spent a night in was a two-story A-1 Motor Lodge somewhere along the Gulf Coast of Florida in the late 60s.
The results of the contest were posted each week starting in mid-February. I watched my name finally appear in the top 750 in the last week of March, only to see it fall out in the first week of April. This went back and forth, week after week – in the top 750 one week and the top 9,250 the next – the “honorable mention category…a.k.a. the “loser bracket.” The stress was nearly debilitating for me, watching my name being volleyed back and forth from the “have” to the “have not” column each week like a tennis ball about to be yelled “OUT!” by the line judge, ending the match with me forfeiting my room at the Ritz to somebody less deserving than me.
I learned from this experience that comparing yourself to others can drive you crazy. Had the contest lasted a whole year, I’m convinced I would have had to be institutionalized if I didn’t die before then.
There was a fellow named Asaph, a contemporary of King David, who experienced some of the same kind of agony I experienced by comparing himself to those who appeared to be ahead of him in the “contest of life.” Asaph wrote Psalms 50 and Psalms 73-83, and was a worship leader for one of David’s tabernacle choirs.
He was trying to put on a good face to let others know he had it all together, especially since he was a spiritual leader and knew he had a responsibility to represent God in the best way. The truth of the matter is that he was hurting, as we can see in Psalm 73. Here he is, a spiritual leader trying to put on a happy face amid his pain and a personal faith failure; a guy who is trying to fill the spiritual tanks of others, while his own “God tank” is running on fumes.
Have you ever felt this way? You’re the one everybody is depending on to get them where they need to go, yet you’re running on empty? Asaph felt this way because he was comparing himself to others and not looking to God. He was playing the winner-this-week-loser-next-week game that I was playing in my firm’s sales contest as his gaze went from God to others. Listen to him as he laments in Psalm 73 (note: this is my paraphrase from Eugene Peterson’s The Message along with some direct quotes from his work – to read Peterson’s rendition in its entirety access this link: Psalm 73 The Message):
“Here I am looking up to the people at the top, envying those who have it made – those who have nothing to worry about and not a care in the world. Unlike me, they have it made with all their riches. I’ve been stupid to play by the rules. What has it gotten me? Nothing but a long run of bad luck – a slap in the face every time I walk out the door. I tried to figure it out, but all I got was a splitting headache. Is God out to lunch? Is nobody tending the store? But now I get it. I realize I almost missed seeing His goodness because I was looking the other way at the wrong things. It wasn’t until I entered the sanctuary of God that I saw the whole picture. When I was surrounded by troubles and bitterness, totally consumed by envy, I was totally ignorant like a dumb ox in God’s presence. You, God, have taken my hand. You wisely and tenderly lead me, and then you bless me. I don’t know why I’m even looking at other people. You’re all I want in heaven and on earth! You are rock-firm and faithful. I’m in your very presence, oh God! How refreshing it is! I’m going to stop looking at others, Lord. You are all I need. You are my home!”
Asaph was in the presence of the Lord the entire time, but he missed the awareness of God’s companionship and the joy that accompanies it because his eyes were “looking the other way at the wrong things.” Sound familiar?
By the way, I did barely qualify for the Cancun trip. I came in dead last in 750th place. I almost missed it, just like Asaph almost missed it. My manager even had a special t-shirt printed up for me that said, “Cancun #750 … Just Glad To Be Here!” What if I had come in 751st? I know I would have been beside myself and would have beaten myself up for being a loser while holding in contempt the person who was occupying my room at the Ritz.
Winning a contest and comparing ourselves to those who have it made, are things that don’t count for eternity. The things that count for eternity are things we store up in heaven (Mt 6:19-21), “where moth or rust can’t destroy.” We are nothing on our own. But that’s ok because we have not been abandoned to do life on our own (Jn 14:16-18). We don’t need what everybody else has because we have everything we need (Ph 4:19).
Notice that it was only when Asaph entered the sanctuary of God that he saw the whole picture. We must do the same. We must enter God’s sanctuary – that quiet place where we encounter Him … that place where His voice is louder than the negative self-talk voice in our head. We must look up, not around, in order to get the whole picture. If we keep looking around, we’ll get only a portion; a distorted view that leads to less than the best God has planned for each of us (Jer 29:11-14).
Play to win this week in the game that really counts!